‘New year, new me!’ We’ve cried in years gone by and hoped that as the clock struck midnight, like a fairy tale, we would be transformed into someone new.
Then reality hits and within a few weeks of ‘good behaviour’ and sheer ‘willpower’ we’re back to our same old habits and feeling anything but the ‘new year, new me’ we had wished for.
Look, I love the idea of drawing a line under an old year as we walk into a new one and there’s definitely something symbolic in this process, BUT and it’s a big BUT, if we think we can just hope and pray our way towards changing our lives, then we are going to be very sadly, disappointed.
So how can we really shift things and stick to our goals?
Be kind in your mind: First up, take the damn pressure off yourself. We are in the middle of a global plague and after Christmas, new year and the turbulent nature of the world right now it’s hardly a conducive space to be smashing your goals. We’re not going to call ourselves names as we try to create a nice life.
Break it down: Write out a big ‘wild, scary’ goal (one you probably have no idea how to achieve and think the audacity of you even writing it down is ridiculous), then write down some smaller year goals, (goals you can kinda imagine you could achieve) and eventually I want you to consider what HABITS you need to create daily to actually move the needle. I KNOW, I know habits are boring but it’s what we do every day that will determine us getting to the goals.
Let it go: When we obsess over our goals, it sends a signal to our brain that we don’t truly believe we can have it and even if you’re still working on your confidence around it, I want you to go at your goals with fun, playfulness and a feeling of ‘wouldn’t it be just amazing if I could pull this off’. That energy will nudge you forwards way quicker than fretting about the ‘how’.
Find your gang: When I set up my self-development membership – The Happy Me Project, one of the biggest reasons was giving people a space of community and accountability. Having a space where people could share their goals and have their peers keep them on track, with love, support and zero judgement was the whole point and I have since watched people thrive because of these exact factors. Find your gang, find your community and shout, sing and talk about what you want your life to look like. Not only will you have support but who knows who else can actually help you get there quicker.
Don’t live in this heady space of setting goals, getting ‘high’ off the idea of who you will be when you achieve these goals and then giving up the moment it gets hard or when it takes a little longer than you’d imagined.
Decide that the prize isn’t just the end goal but who you’re going to become along the way.